What do you do, when you dont know what to do?

I lost my job in December for reasons unknown to me. It was 2 weeks before Christmas, and although it was rough to see my kids only get a few things under the tree (which we didn't have), there was an unusual peace about it. Thankfully, I qualified for unemployment, had some other little money coming in to ensure the bills were paid, and even decided on 12/31 at noon to drive to OKC to see my in-laws. An unusual peace.

One of the reasons for this peace was I had applied for a position, I knew I was PERFECT for, and I had a few insiders helping me along with the process. The position would have been amazing. It was with a local university, which after a year they would pay for my Masters degree. Good pay, good benefits, good  environment. It was the perfect job for me.

I found out 2 days ago, after 3 separate interviews, I didn't get the job. And they wouldn't tell me why. They gave me a canned answer of "All I can tell you is, the position posted was very competitive." However, they reposted the position yesterday, telling me no one else has been offered the position as of yet.

Honestly, I was stunned unto numbness. I thought I had this one in the bag. I had inside help, the process went smooth, the interviews went great. The environment was Christian, the people have similar values, the school is solid in Christian standards, but it didn't happen.

So, I had to ask myself, what do you do, when you dont know what to do?

I may say that it is impossible, but God says All things are possible! Luke 18:27
I may say I want to forget it all, but God says His grace is sufficient! 2 Cor 12:9
I often can't figure things out, but God will direct my steps! Proverbs 3:5-6
No matter how hard I try, I just can't do it, but God can do ALL things! Phillipians 4:13
With a family I am worried about tomorrow, but God asks for all my baggage and cares! 1 Peter 5:7
With all the stress I can't manage it all, but God says all my needs will be supplied! Phillipians 4:19

I was perfect for this job. But God has something else in store. I dont know what it is, to be honest, but I have already seen God supply, order, and direct. I think you might be wise to trust in him for your situation as well. He CAN and WILL do it!

A broken home?

This may sound a little trivial, but I don't like the term, broken home. What's so broken about it? The fact that your mom and dad's marriage didn't survive doesn't mean your home is broken. Why is this terminology so problematic? Because people who come from broken homes, sometimes take on the idea that being they came form a home that was "broken", they must also be broken.

I prefer to say, that you came from a home that was built differently. Why take on such a negative connotation? I was speaking with a mentor and Pastor a few days ago about this subject. He mentioned he works with a number of young men at church who come from "broken homes". And now the majority of them, who are 25-28, are unwilling to fully commit to marriage. Anytime their family or girlfriend mentions getting hitched, they flee for the hills. They often ditch the girl that is actually perfect for them because they are afraid to end up like their parents. They are afraid of breaking someone else.

Avoiding situations that could cause harm, is like avoiding water for fear of drowning. One must take the chance of getting hurt if one wants to further themselves and their family. I look at it this way, if you have nothing to lose in a relationship, then you're really not in it.

So, don't think of your home as broken. Think of it as built differently, or maybe having 2 different homes. You're not broken. You are exactly as God wants you to be, forgiven, saved, and validated.

What to do with the Dream

I have always had a bit of a "entrepreneurial spirit" about me. Ok it's more than a bit. I have been attempting to start and run a thriving business since I was a kid. It might have been a service, but typically it was some type of witty invention.

When I was about 8 I spilt an entire jug of sweet tea in the fridge. It was everywhere! All over every leftover tupperware, all over every bag of fruit or veggie. It was sticky, and I was frustrated to no end having to clean it before my mom got home to see the mess. The answer: a small thin shelf that slid underneath the fridge shelf that if any liquid or crumb fell into, it could be remedied easily and without much mess.  The idea seemed almost stupid it was so good.

Now I dont know about you, but when I was 8, I didn't know any venture capitalist, or investors, so my idea just sat on my mind waiting for the right person to come along to pitch it to to bring it to homes in every city! 3 years later, I saw an ad for the same idea in a Kenmore fridge. I was devastated! But did I learn my lesson?

I was 20 something and a buddy of mine and myself decided we wanted to shoot extreme sports videos backed up by Christian rock music, and then have people give their testimonies to cover the gap left open by Christian media. We shot the footage, and then I went on vacation. 2 weeks after I got back, one of the Baldwin Brothers had released and entire series of Christian Extreme Sports videos online, and the servers couldn't keep up.

When God gives you an idea, you have to run with it. If you dont, he is liable to give it to someone else. When God tells you to do something, you better just go ahead and do it. He's a patient guy, but he won't let your laziness,/stubbornness/procrastination/ be what keeps work going forward.

If he called you to a distant land... Go!
If he sent you the right man/woman to marry and you're getting cold feet... Commit!
If he gave you a crappy job... Work it!
If he called you to ministry... Minister!

If you are waiting on the right person to come along to make all your dreams come true then you will be waiting a really long time.

If he doesn't pass it off to someone else, he might just redirect your journey to make you look at it again. Look at Jonah! Don't end up in the belly of a whale to find the nerve to get your act going! Let God be your strength and wisdom and get to work!!!

Do you dream any more?

When I was a kid, I used to anticipate a dream. It was re-occurring. It started with me going to the living room and there sat my grandfather, who had recently died. He would ask me to crawl up into his lap and he would tell me a story. I don't remember the story. I don't even know if I just thought he was telling me a story. All I remember is looking at him. Examining every pit in his worn face. Every wrinkle in the corner of his eyes. I would run my hand across his cheek feeling the stubble from a day old shave. I could see the skin beneath his hair as his stark white hair thinned from old age. He was always wearing a thread worn white dress shirt along with a pair of grey slacks.

As a 7 year old, I was scared of forgetting what he looked like after his death. I am luck to have had this dream, as sometimes I can recall in my mind just how he looked. Both happy, and sad. I can recall the sound of his voice, and even his smell. It was all because of this dream. Even 25 years later, I can tell you details about my grandpa's appearance.

As believers we are asked to dream as well. We are told to hope for Christ return, and to hold close to a vision, lest we perish. However, in out maturity as adults, and as religious people, we begin to lose the art of dreaming. my mom used to always say, It's free to dream!" It still is.

What was it 5, 10, 20 years ago that you dreamt of for the Kingdom? Were you to be a pastor, worship leader, writer, or missionary? Were you going to be the one who traveled to unknown lands and delivered the Gospel to fresh hungry ears? Were you going to take up the role of teacher to those who needed direction and education to take u thier own cross? Were you going to be the mentor at the local "Y" in order to be a Godly influence in some young persons life? Were you going to travel around the world just lending a hand in impoverished 3rd world countries, all to the glory of God?

Take a look at John the Revelator. He was 92 when he wrote the book of Revelation. What if John had let his dream of doing something great for God die? If John can do it at 92, you can do it today!